50 Cliches used by American/British Screenwriters

You're not the man I thought you were

I'm not the girl you thought I was

Goodbye (insert troubled lover's name)

No, I can see perfectly well what's going on here. Crystal.

I must have been blind not to notice!

I know I haven't known you for long, but -

Yes, he's been held up in town, so -

Wait! You can't leave like this!

(post coitally) Actually, I've gotta go, so -

(also post coitally) Wooooooow! That was - I mean - totally - can't believe - so hot - never thought - (continuous ad-lib-style humorous/awkward screwball dialogue.)

I just don't wanna see you get hurt.

It's a miracle!

You've gotta be kidding me?

Are you for real?

Is he for real?

Are you SERIOUS?!

We can't be together - I'm sorry

At last we can be together.

But he's SO hot!

YOU! with, with - HER?!!

(A black female character, usually part of a posse of girls) Mmm - you look FIERCE, lil mamma! (she has little other dialogue)

I can't believe it - right behind my back!

I treat you like a princess - and you stab me in the back!

I can't - Johnny's my best friend.

I'll always remember you.

Yes - well, I was quite wild back then.

Mom! C'mon - plllleeeaaaasssseeeee????? (Mom gives in with a cheeky knowing smile to attractive male protagonist)

... Of course, that was before the war.

(Upper-class English man's name)! You're not dressed for dinner!

I've suddenly got to go up to London.

If only things were different.

Well, things are different now, aren't they?

I think I'm in love with two women - at the same time!

I bet you say that to all the girls?

He says that to all the girls.

Come on, grandmama, it's not as bad as all that.

What a charmer your young friend here is!

Not in my house!

Not in this house!

Not if I have anything to do with it!

We were so young back then - so naive!

(Knowing - usually sexually knowing - older female character) Oh you will, honey. You will.

You must know that I adore you. Adore you.

What is it, Bilson?!

It's Martha - she's had an accident. SHE'S DEAD!!

(butler) Oh, sorry, sir. Didn't know you were back so early.

(butler) Oh, sorry madam. Didn't know you were still up.

Bilson, leave the brandy.

(rotund cook) She's still up there drinkin' the brandy!

I can't believe this is happening to me!

She is a terrible old bassoon.

This post was inspired by the recent BBC adaptation of Upstairs/Downstairs.
The dialogue means it is no Downton.

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